Tuesday, December 24, 2013

A Letter to our precious Angel due Dec 25th

Its now been 6 months since we lost you and not a day goes by I dont wish I could have held you at least one time. To carry you in my stomach and feel each kick, to hear your heart beat and lay in bed to fall asleep  like I did your sister's. To see you on that monitor and watch you to flips all around and be an acrobat. To find out if you were a girl or a boy, to feel that joy of pregnancy and loving excitement of delivery.
We yearned for you so much, a year later exactly on the day we lost your other sibling is the day we found out we were expecting you. I was overjoyed but yet guarded because I feared Id loose you to. I went to the Dr quit a few times, getting blood work done and ultrasounds to make sure everything was going according to plan. The plan I had hoped for was to bring home a precious Gift from God on Christmas day. A hope of being able to hold my sweet Rainbow baby after such a terrible storm of loosing two of your siblings.
A few short weeks, 9 to be exact would be a day that changed my life yet again. My hopes of bringing home a baby  been dashed. My dream of a baby to whom we would name after your PawPaw who passed away or your Great Grandfather or even a Grandmother.
May 17th will always be a day I will remember, the day I miscarried you, the day you went to be with God.
I have learned so much from you, I have learned to not take what children we have here on earth for granted, to not take a pregnancy, delivery for granted. To always thank the Lord for giving me the oppurtunity of giving you life.
I pray one day when I see you, you will know how much we wanted you, how much you were loved by all.
I thank God for opening my womb for giving me the oppurtunity to become pregnant with you, thanking him always for the gift of Life, the gift of opening a women's womb

1 comment:

joyfuljoyful said...

Praying for you today. I am so sorry for the losses you've suffered. They are waiting in heaven for you
Hugs.❤