Sunday, November 9, 2008

Why is it so hard staying positive about concieving another

I have been such a wreck these last few days.I have longed for another baby since my hubby had his vasectomy. I felt my motherhood of having babies was over when it was done and I waited for so long for hubby to say yes,he wanted more. We had the vasectomy reversal done after waiting a yr from the original vasectomy,so in essence I have waited to conceive our baby #8 since then. I took a pregnancy test yesterday, thought my eyes were playing tricks on me and of course they were. I felt crushed,so crushed. I have not felt very optimistic about this at all,something like God is saying OK, I have other things for you to do first,then maybe I'll bless you with another child. After our miscarriage in June 2006, the Lord changed my perspective of having more children, and yet we went and surgically removed that,but soon we knew it was wrong. Now I feel as if I'm not going to get the opportunity again.I guess waiting for the vasectomy reversal to get here and now it has and I'm just not sure we will be blessed with another child. We are blessed beyond anything that is upon this world,our children we have now. I know God does not do this stuff intentionally,but I feel as if I'm not doing what I should be doing and maybe he is saying this to me through not conceiving. Why can't I be one of those that are able to conceive so fast after a vasectomy reversal, Are we doing something wrong?Alot of people tell me, it's just too early, it's in his timing,maybe it's not in his timing right now.

7 comments:

Heather said...

hang in there... :0) I'll be praying for you guys!

Anonymous said...

I would like to encourage you to continue to trust in the Lord. You have placed things in their proper place now is the time to trust that THAT is what is the most important, obedience. Praise the Lord for your obedience to Him.

I would love to add you to the QF blogroll but I need your email address. You can email me directly rather than publishing your email in my comments if you like, you can find my email in my profile.

Anne/kq said...

It's hard to trust sometimes. I know you know you just have to trust, but sometimes it is hard to just let go, say "it's not under my control." Especially as mothers, we want to control our little worlds! But in reality we are only in control of the way we REACT to our worlds, of the choices we make. You have made what you know is the right choice, now your only choice is to choose to keep positive, keep your hope, and accept the will of the Lord in your life. And that is one of the hardest choices to make, because you can't just make it once, you have to make the choice over and over every time you doubt or get negative. I hope you are able to hope, and to stay happy. And remember the great comfort that can be found in the word of the Lord, I always find great strength there as well as in prayer. Even if you can only take 5 minutes to sit by yourself and read His word, take that 5 minutes and make it part of your day, it makes such a difference!

A homeschool mother to many said...

Anne,
Thank you so much for such encouragement. It helps.

Teesa69 said...

(((HUGS))) TOY!

Sabrina said...

Just wanted to send more hugs to you Nancy!

Sherbear2975 said...

I know you are discouraged, but its going to happen! HUGS!!!